- 11 Unique Dating Culture In Japan (Kokuhaku Custom)
- Then Comes Marriage
- Japanese Dating Culture | Back to Japan
- The Shocking Truth About Dating in Japan as a Foreigner
That is not what you want to hear on a first date, or ever, from someone that you want to go out with. While out on your first date, there are more things you will encounter that can affect your chances of a second date. In the end, culture shock impacts all areas of life, and dating is not the exception. For her Love In Japan series, Hilary addresses issues that crop up in dating in Japan—everything from how to meet men, what to expect in a relationship, how to handle issues of cheating, engagements, marriage and of course, break-ups.
If you have any issues you would like Hilary to tackle in the series, leave us a comment!
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Mack on Your Date Japanese first dates are neutral — there are no public displays of affection and no overt physical or verbal displays of desire. To Pay or Not To Pay? Pay Your Way On first dates in Japan, men feel that they must pay. Offer to Pay Your Share Having agreed that you should allow your date to cover the payment on your first date, the courtesy of suggesting partial contribution will always be appreciated.
Go Full Fashion Model My grandmother used to say that women wearing too much makeup look cheap, and that way of thinking still exists in many parts of the world, Japan included. Dress Like a Girly Girlier Version of You This is the hardest part for me — I live for dark colors and leather jackets, but some of my most successful first dates have happened when I caved and wore something more feminine, even if it were paired with a pair of Doc Martens. Going Natural Earth Garden Winter Hot Pot Date Nabe Hut A Stairway to Paradise Musical: An American In Paris.
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11 Unique Dating Culture In Japan (Kokuhaku Custom)
Get a free drink! Get a free dessert after Napoli-style pizza! Kokuhaku meaning is an act of confessing how you feel towards a person, this is usually done by woman. All over the world, guys are expected to be more vocal and active to show that they like a person and woman is supposed to wait for some action to happen.
In Japan it is very different. Woman are expected to be vulnerable, open and active about their feeling. On the other side guys are expected to be calm and poised. They should not express their feeling too much. They need to wait for what a woman wants to do. That is why the love confession is done by woman and sometimes woman pay for dates rather than man.
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Friends are a very important part of our life. They shape us to be who we are and their approval means so much to us, including in the dating area. In japan it is also considered important so before a date, usually partners mingle together with their friends. This is so that their circle of friends can know their partner more. Events like these usually happen for five to six times. After the circle of friends give their approval, they go on to a more private date, just the two of them.
This is one of the unique dating culture in Japan. In some dates, especially in the western culture, physical intimacy is not really serious. In fact it is done often to show our affection. But in Japan it takes a long time before you can get to a stage of being okay with physical touch. Usually in japan you start having physical intimacy when you have a girlfriend and boyfriend status.
This physical intimacy includes hugging, kissing and even touching.
Then Comes Marriage
For the woman in Japan, foreign man is really exotic and lovable. Some woman in Japan really want to have a half Asian and half western kid. They think that foreign man is an exotic accessory. Although foreign man can have a date very quickly, even change date from time to time, for foreign woman it is a different case scenario.
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Foreign woman are expected to be fluent in Japanese. And because foreign woman is usually independent and modern, japan man finds it improbable for them to be a partner for them. This is because japan man seek woman that wants to stay home, take care of the kids, pour drinks for them, and do all the chores at home for them. It is known that Japanese people is cold and they usually do not show interest openly. But too much flirting will actually make them not too interested.
Japanese Dating Culture | Back to Japan
Especially for men, you do not want to overly flirt because desirable man in Japan is actually man that is cool, poised and busy. This is one of the dating culture in Japan. Sometimes people will date literally anyone when they are desperate. People is usually open to give second chances so that they can know their dates more. But some Japanese people are usually kind of judgmental about their date. They expect someone close to perfect to be their romantic partner.
This means that once they have sent he defect in their romantic partner, they will not think of continuing their romantic relationship with this girl or guy. In Japan, the gender roles are reversed.
The Shocking Truth About Dating in Japan as a Foreigner
That means that man are supposed to sit and wait for some action and woman are supposed to do all the confessing and chasing part. And woman in Japan usually go hard and persistent when they want to be close to a guy. Some women are usually hurt after one rejection from a guy they have a crush on which is normal.
But one of the dating culture in Japan is that one small rejection means nothing to a woman. In fact, it makes them try harder in chasing her.
Woman in Japan will do it by being kind to him, giving gifts that remind them of him and doing literally anything for him. The dating culture in Japan is quite unusual and fun. Those are some of the dating culture in Japan but it is not set in stone.