Dating a social outcast

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  1. 7 Ways You Can Accidentally Become A Social Outcast
  2. Do you think GAG should combine these topics?
  3. Would you date a guy who was a social outcast?
  4. 7 Ways You Can Accidentally Become A Social Outcast |

You might stop them from hurting themselves with a simple kind gesture and never even know it. I once read a story in a magazine back in the 90s about an older kid who saw a younger kid struggling to carry a lot of stuff on the street one day.

He decided to help him. They walked home together and talked and he ended up inviting him to hang out later. A year later, the younger kid admitted he was planning to kill himself the day they met and he was carrying the stuff he'd cleaned out of his locker to take home. The only thing that stopped him was the older kid being nice to him.

I would be his friend because I also tend to not follow certain societal norms. I used to have sympathy for these types in school, whether they were bully victims or whatever, so I think my young self would have been quick to approach him and ask him what's wrong, but in a masculine kind of way that's mixes a tone of a little bit of concern with a little bit indifference, all while encouraging him to kind of toughen up and stop embarrassing himself. It's mainly because I was kind of similar in terms of emotional state and sharing some traumatic experiences, but had a bit more of a manly upbringing to help me not just break down and cry in front of everyone and embarrass myself like this though I did find myself reaching that point when I started getting into relationships with girls.

That said, I think I'd at most only try to be a secret friend of his, sticking up for him when needed, because here is when my not so noble side kicks in.

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Let's face it, these guys kinda suck. They're socially-awkward misfits, and they rarely get better because they don't have any kind of masculine qualities or interests to really kind of blend in properly with this guy playing piano and writing poems. I was socially awkward too but at least I recognized the things I was doing wrong.

They're too gentle and soft and never seek to get any tougher.

7 Ways You Can Accidentally Become A Social Outcast

They don't realize they're doing it all wrong. I tried to teach these types before and the information kind of went over their heads. Yeah, a little bit. I was still somewhat superficial. It wasn't just ashamed to be with these types -- they can be genuine party poopers where you can invite them to a social event, vouch for him with your friends, only to find he's awkward and sitting in a corner and then wants to leave.

Then I'd have to help him home and also kind of leave early. His parents looks at photos of him and cry, when you talk to him people look at you like your crazy and asks who are you talking too? You wake up one night and you see him sleeping on your floor.

Do you think GAG should combine these topics?

He tells you he forgot what physical pain felt like. Would you still hang around him or avoid him? Yeah, he's a ghost but he doesn't want to accept the fact he's dead. And he's angry about the way he was killed. He follows you around because only a few people can see him. I was just seeing what people would do if they could see ghosts and what they would do if they experienced something like this.

I think it will work much better on film. I think with writing, it's kind of hard to leave odd clues here and there that he might be a ghost without making the reader wonder what's up. The clues end up being emphasized instead of kind of subtly being left in the background. Plenty of people thought the Holocaust "worked". Nope, guys who make genuine lifestyle changes, like working out, improving their career, improving their hobbies and social repertoire aren't doing it to "please women" - they're doing it for themselves , and it naturally attracts women and people in general because it's not done to "please anyone", it's done because they're genuine and have a real purpose in life outside of gaining others' approval Guys like you do insincere things to "please women",.

Just like the employee who kisses his bosses ass hoping to get a raise, then when he doesn't get the raise he cusses his boss out and quits. Real alpha men are good employees whether they "get something out of it" or not - because they could give a hoot about "pleasing people" - they do it because they value themselves and their own sense of manhood. Nope kid that's what pussies like you tried on women - guys like me always knew that confidence, dominance, and machismo are what are attractive - qualities you have none of.

Nope it's because you're too dumb to write anything coherant. No hypocrisy here - being manly and confident attracts women - saying "I shouldn't have to do it because women don't" means you're too lazy to improve, and just want validation. Stop relating your personal experiences to other men. Guys like you do things just trying to "please women" - that's why it's never worked for you, women can see it's just an act to get their approval rather than sincere.

Would you date a guy who was a social outcast?

Manly men could care less about "pleasing women", and they don't have to anyway - they do things to please themselves because they actually have values and purpose in life - and they naturally attract women without trying because women can see it's sincere, not just some act they did trying to "please women".

The fact that you even suggested that self-improvement is about "pleasing women" rather than "pleasing onself" is pathetic beyond belief. Well this thread got out of hand quickly Please stop responding to NinetiesAce's points as his original argument never really had any legs to stand on in the first place There's what he thinks, and there's what actually happens in reality.

Welcome to Reddit,

NinetiesAce is just a little muckspreader thats only here to bring other guys down to make himself feel raised up. His typical repetitive mindset.. I sense this guy was controlled by manly bullies,and now has control, low masculinity and bully issues himself. He became like his enemy. Originally Posted by Vawx. Last edited by NinetiesAce; at Originally Posted by BritishBear.

Originally Posted by Simon What the fck does "improving your hobbies" even mean? Half of the guys I see do all of this. Most people have never studied body language, or confidence building, or anything at all - they've only learned from the people they've been exposed to, and if they had bad influences they have no grounds to go on.

I think that you and the other guys in this thread do, yes. Do not do anything you are uncomfortable doing just to make people like you. Be a good friend. People who enjoy true and lasting popularity are those who are good friends, whether they have one friend or one hundred friends.

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Being a good friend means being respectful, fair, interested, trustworthy, honest, caring, and kind. Bullying goes beyond simply being excluded from the group or normal teasing, and it is a serious problem. Bullying includes teasing that is hurtful, unkind, and constant. It can range from hitting, shoving, name-calling, threats, and mocking to taking the victim's money or possessions, like taking a child's lunch money or sneakers.

Learn why bullying happens. Bullying occurs for many reasons. Sometimes bullies pick on other people because they need a victim to feel more important, popular, or in control. They may think their behavior is normal because they come from families where everyone calls each other names or uses violence. Bullying is not something you should tough out on your own.

7 Ways You Can Accidentally Become A Social Outcast |

If you are being bullied, tell someone. Most schools and communities have anti-bullying policies. Notifying an adult will spur the adult to follow the procedures in place to stop the bullying. A parent, teacher, coach, principal, lunchroom attendant, or other adult can help you handle the bullying.

Identify at least five adults you can go to for help when you are being bullied. Find a place where you go to be safe from bullies, such as church, a community center, your home, etc. Avoid the bully, and use a buddy system. Staying away from the bully and avoiding being alone can help in the short-term. Don't go where you know the bully will be, and try not be alone when the bully is present. Buddy up with a friend on the bus, in the hallways, at recess, or wherever the bully is. There is safety in numbers.


Bullies are encouraged to continue bullying when they provoke a reaction from the person they are bullying. Remain calm when you are bullied. Do not to respond to bullying by fighting or bullying back. It can quickly escalate into violence, trouble, and someone getting injured. It will take a lot of practice, but it useful to learn how to stay calm in an upsetting situation.

Not reacting may eventually get the bully to leave you alone. Sometimes the best thing to do is to wear a "poker face" until you are clear of danger. Set clear boundaries with your bully. Firmly and clearly tell the bully to stop, then walk away. Practice ways to ignore hurtful comments, like acting like you are texting someone on your cell phone.

Eventually, the bully will probably get bored and will leave you alone. If a bully physically attacks or hurts you, notify an adult and the authorities. Physical bullying is called assault and is illegal. Telling someone will ensure that the bully is punished and cannot hurt anyone else. Being bullied can hurt your self-esteem. Know that there is nothing wrong with you; the problem is with the bully.

Spend time with friends who make you feel good about yourself. If you are being bullied or are feeling unhappy in any way because you feel like a social outcast, tell an adult whom you trust. Consider enrolling in a social skills program.

Dealing with depression and bullying are not things that you should handle by yourself. Learn why being a social outcast hurts. Human beings are an intrinsically social species. Much of our species' success is due to our highly developed ability to cooperate and interact with each other. From an evolutionary standpoint, it is not surprising that instances of interpersonal rejection and social exclusion are negative experiences for individuals.

Learn why social exclusion happens. There are many reasons why people exclude or ostracize others, so it can help to ask yourself why you are being excluded. Being excluded is not your fault, but it helps to understand how others think in order to learn how to make more friends. There are 4 main groups of people who are ostracized: From an evolutionary standpoint, groups accept people who add something to the group.

Those who hinder the group's operation can become excluded. Sometimes people are excluded because they are difficult to deal with. Other times, people are excluded simply for being different, and people naturally fear what they don't understand. People who are a danger to the group.