Funny drunk hookup stories


  1. 44 Of The Craziest Random (But True) Hookup Stories You’ve Ever Heard | Thought Catalog
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I ended up having to walk back home and promised to jump start his car in the morning. I ended up having to leave him there because I was running late for work. He ended up having to ask some guy doing lawn work for a neighbor to jump his car. I quickly stopped but not before I got throw up all over my hair. The guy I was with luckily had his eyes closed and was pretty far gone too but I was so grossed out. I quickly grabbed him to head into the shower with me without any explination because I had no idea what to do. But one night we were both drunk and I was mad at an ex, so he was being super touchy and I figured why not.

44 Of The Craziest Random (But True) Hookup Stories You’ve Ever Heard | Thought Catalog

Like not a light tap, like full force slaps the shit out of my face. And my jaw literally dropped. I looked in a mirror on my way out and had a legit hand print on my face. When I studied abroad I was regularly hooking up with a local.

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A few weeks after I got back to America, I had a message from him on Facebook telling me that I have Chlamydia and that I had given it to him. So the next day I went to my schools health clinic and got checked for STIs. It takes a few days to get results back, but since I was sure that I had it they gave me the pills to take immediately, just to get rid of it. I got my test results back the next day— negative.

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Needless to say he thought the plop sound was me taking a huge dump until he later realized it was me actually using his razor to shave the rest of my vagina. I was very wrong thankfully her alone and not with her family. So she saw me mid act and then we all screamed and she ran out. And then later she told him that he should trim his pubes and I was very thankful. After I refused he put on Bob Marley as we fell asleep.. My own personal sexual DJ! When I studied abroad I hooked up with this Australian guy named Brad.

Brad was a hot surfer babe, but an elitist jerk. He was hot and I wanted to show my friends, no shame. A few months go by and a rumor was spread about me hooking up with this guy Tim.

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My friends and I denied the rumors and went about our lives. So casual saturday night celebrating my friends 22nd birthday, she decides she wants to see male stripers so we all bought tickets to the show. We all pitched in for my friend to get a lap dance on stage from one of the stripers. Next thing I know im on stage getting a lap dance and for the rest of the night this particular striper was dancing with my friend and I. At the end of the show we spoke to him about going to a bar or coming over, my birthday present to my friend….

He agreed and offered to drive us back to my apartment, I politely declined and said we could meet him back at my place, it took some thorough convincing to get my friend away from thier car and into ours. I agreed that was a good idea since we didnt think the striper would show up anyway. I got home called my boyfriend and next thing i know the striper is calling me saying hes in my driveway with his friend.

I ran downstairs and told them my friend had gone home. They came up anyway and we akwardly all sat in my living room.

  1. 44 Of The Craziest Random (But True) Hookup Stories You’ve Ever Heard!
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  7. Thankfully my roommate came home, confused why i was in our living room with two random guys. I told her they were stripers and said she cshould get a lap dance since she had recently been dump. Next thing i know im cuddling with a striper on my couch and hes asking to see my room. Naive me shows him leaving his friend on the couch.

    He picked me up threw me on the bed and i had hot sex with a striper. The next day I asked the guy I hooked up with if he was in high school, becaues he looked like he was 12… ever since then he never says hi to me and we literally see him everytime we leave the house.


    One guy I was hooking up with took eating me out a little too literally… there was blood. Banged a legit thai guy in bangkok who didnt speak a lick of english. The Drug that Breaks Hearts. Jailey and Me July 10, This makes me feel better about myself.

    17 People Share Their Most Brutally Cringeworthy Hook-Up Story

    Interested in partnering with the Mack in Style team? I Quit Fast Fashion December 31, Ring in in Style December 13, The Men in Your Life November 28, I just thought it was so awkward and so funny at the same time. I couldn't do anything but laugh every time he asked because he had to have asked me at least a dozen times and I had never been asked that before.

    So, I was hanging out with a group of friends a while back and it was one of the first times any of us had drank alcohol. We all got pretty tipsy and decided to play truth or dare. So, she takes me upstairs and when I thought we were about to hook up she starts rubbing her body against me but not kissing me. I try to kiss her and she turns her head away.

    Embarrassing, Cringe-worthy and Downright Hilarious Hookup Stories

    So that was one of the weirdest times I tried to hook up, I guess. Well, one day I went to a party and ended up sitting next to this really cute guy all night. I was super drunk so I think I was actually managing to have a decent conversation with him.

    I also then sprayed someone with a fire extinguisher so it was a pretty memorable night. Long story short, last year my friend got insanely drunk and brought this girl back to his room. She was giving him a blowjob and he fell asleep. He felt so bad that he sent her an apology text the next day. They ended up being at the same party the next weekend and I guess the apology was effective because he brought her back to his dorm again.

    With the same girl. We were both super drunk at a party so we went out to the front porch and started making out. Brett and I were actually having a really lovely time when it got too cold to be outside so I suggested that we go into his car, purely for the purpose of being warm. For some reason he wanted to park at a dairy bar, which is right next to a main road. He assured me that nobody could see anything and kind of made me keep going, which was awfully rude, but, whatever. Then another car pulled up. Only, from this one, some sort of weird, squawking sound was coming out.

    We sat there and watched while the two cars actually, physically, exchanged a bird. After they left I was completely done, but Brett clearly still had a bit of a problem, so I told him he could finish himself off while I kind of just sat there. But, because some higher power has it out for me, a car with flashing red and blue lights pulled up riiiight next to us. Pretty sure the police officer saw my boob. So it was quite an experience. Skip to main content. All names have been changed to protect the privacy of those involved. Sophomore male A little back story: Sophomore female Over the summer I had a short fling with a guy from work.